Depression affects millions of people worldwide, but when it comes to men, it can often go unnoticed or misunderstood. Social norms and expectations surrounding masculinity often make it difficult for men to acknowledge their struggles with mental health. In this post, we’ll explore what depression looks like in men, its potential causes, and how they can take action to heal using Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT).

What Depression in Men Looks Like

Depression can manifest differently in men than in women. While sadness is a common symptom, men often experience depression in more hidden ways, such as:

Anger or irritability: Instead of appearing withdrawn or sad, many men express their depression through frustration and anger.

Fatigue or exhaustion: Men with depression might feel physically worn out and lack energy, even after adequate rest.

Difficulty concentrating: Mental fog, forgetfulness, or feeling "out of it" can signal deeper mental health struggles.

Isolation: A common but often overlooked symptom, men may withdraw from social circles, avoiding family and friends.

Substance use: Some men cope with their feelings through alcohol, drugs, or risky behavior, masking deeper emotional pain.

Why Men Experience Depression Differently

There are several reasons why men may experience or express depression differently:

Cultural expectations: Men are often taught to be tough, self-reliant, and emotionally restrained. This pressure can prevent them from expressing vulnerability or seeking help.

Fear of stigma: Many men feel that admitting to depression is a sign of weakness or failure, which can lead to denial or delay in getting the support they need.

Different coping mechanisms: Instead of seeking therapy or talking to loved ones, men may engage in behaviors like working excessively, exercising excessively, or turning to substances to distract themselves.

The Role of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) in Treating Depression

ACT offers a unique approach to treating depression by focusing on accepting emotions rather than avoiding them. It encourages men to take meaningful action aligned with their values, despite feeling depressed. Here are three core principles of ACT that can help men dealing with depression:

Acceptance: Depression can make it feel like you’re trapped by negative emotions, but ACT teaches you to accept these feelings rather than fight them. For example, rather than suppressing feelings of sadness or frustration, you can acknowledge them without letting them control your actions.

Defusion: Thoughts of inadequacy or failure are common in depression. ACT emphasizes creating distance from these thoughts. By practicing mindfulness techniques, you can learn to see these negative thoughts for what they are—just thoughts, not facts.

Committed Action: Despite how difficult depression can feel, taking small steps towards valued goals can build momentum. ACT encourages taking action that matters to you, whether it’s reconnecting with loved ones, pursuing hobbies, or making a meaningful contribution to your work.

How to Get Help

If you’re a man struggling with depression, remember that reaching out for help is a strength, not a weakness. Therapy, particularly ACT-based approaches, can provide the tools and support needed to overcome these challenges. Working with a therapist who specializes in ACT can help you focus on what truly matters in your life, rather than getting stuck in the struggle with your thoughts and feelings.

Final Thoughts

Depression in men can often go unrecognized due to societal pressures and the different ways it manifests. But by understanding the signs, and seeking help through ACT or other forms of therapy, men can start on the path toward healing. You don’t have to face depression alone—there are steps you can take to feel better, reclaim your confidence, and live a life aligned with your values.

If you or someone you know is experiencing depression, consider reaching out to a professional who can guide you through a recovery process that makes sense for you. Remember, there’s no shame in seeking support—taking action is the first step towards feeling better.